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DREAMING WITH OPEN EYES

by Violet Evergreen

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1.
CLEARVIEW 04:30
I’m falling asleep again The days are creeping together now Can’t remember All these dreams that are blending in Wish I was here but I still somehow Lost my temper I’m counting sheep in my head Cause anything would be better than What I should see My body’s sinking in just like lead Into this ocean of nothingness I’m releasing I want to believe my eyes Never was any good at these goodbyes Leave me in my head So many places I never went Leave me in my bed So many faces I never met I’m reading my mind today Nothing else seems to interest My attention Do you think you could help me stay Awake for long enough to be missed When I’m mentioned Forgot what this feeling’s like Gotta ask if I’m feeling anything at all If I could numb it I think I might But feeling nothing would probably just get old I wanna believe her lies Never was any good at these goodbyes Leave me in my head So many places I never went Leave me in my bed So many faces I never met Leave me in my head So many years I have yet to spend Leave me in the end All of this hurt I have yet to mend
2.
TAKE THE BUS 02:06
Wipe your eyes It’s time to come clean You’re paralyzed Let’s end the routine Quit fighting me This isn’t my fault The fuck is he Leaving letters and calls We took our time The things we saw We fought our fight To lose it all You played your games And strung along Your ride back home No excuses No replays I’m so useless Without your name We’re better off Going our ways I’m still in awe Was I just another phase Have better luck Whoever comes next She’s quite the fuck But emotionally wrecked We took our time The things we saw We fought our fight To lose it all You played your games And strung along Your ride back home
3.
CELLAR 03:14
Take it off my back Tell me what I lack They told me shoot your shot but Read between the lines Vomit my insides Think I need target practice Take away everything I used to say I think maybe we could feel the same Gave away all the shame That I used to try to tame All in hopes that you’d still know my name Tell me I fucked up Wish me better luck Repairing my own self worth I’ll pour it down the drain Remember it’s a game Forget I ever asked you Take away everything I used to say, I think maybe we could feel the same, Gave away all the shame, That I used to try to tame, All in hopes that you’d still know my name With you I’d be on my best behavior I’d keep my cool in front of your friends Each day with you I know I would savor And if we fight I’ll be first to make amends With you I’d be perfectly content My eyes won’t leave for anyone else Too bad I’m not more confident Instead I’m stuck here playing myself Take away everything I used to say I think maybe we could feel the same Gave away all the shame That I used to try to tame All in hopes that you’d still know my name
4.
MIRROR 03:08
Leave the light on That kind of night I’m not sleeping right these days Fever dreams aren’t So new to me but I’ve never heard them say You’re not special You’re not good enough at all Not good enough Please can I stay I’ve been looking for a ride And it’s cold outside Where are my keys Cause I’m lost in the sound And I wanna be found Face it now You’re burning out Can’t you hear the sounds they say You’re not special You’re not good enough at all Not good enough When did you Get so consumed In what the others do You take a few Sleep in till two It’s catching up too soon Please can I stay, I’ve been looking for my ride And it’s cold outside Where are my keys Cause I’m lost in this town But I wanna be found
5.
SIDEWALK 03:44
Wasting my time Waiting from the sidelines Feels like my fight ain’t over Forget my touch Memories can be a bit much Realize I’m not your savior Watch me blush As if I still had feelings for you Still be hushed And don’t pretend to care like you do Give it another day Giving my life away Still kneeling No feelings These words are too revealing Give up my privacy Another worthless lay Forever And ever Until he says whenever Wasting my time Waiting from the sidelines Feels like my fight ain’t over So play my favorite song They’ll never notice that it’s not for you I’ll play my cards wrong To find out something that was never true I’ve been walking On this road for too damn long now Give it another day Giving my life away Still kneeling No feelings These words are too revealing Give up my privacy Another worthless lay Forever And ever Until he says whenever Wasting my time Waiting from the sidelines Feels like my fight ain’t over
6.
SISTER 04:30
Blood, hate, and betrayal Faithless and wasteful The innocence raped her How, how could you do this Something so heartless He’ll pay for it later Now rest your head on my shoulder Tell me it’s over You have all the power Drink to feel not to forget Sacred words filled with regret Hate yourself another time Close your eyes and you’ll be fine We keep growing older Thought that I knew her That innocent flower I hate seeing her in my mirror Not getting clearer She’ll pay for it later We came into this world together A pair of pretenders But I’ll fucking end her Drink to feel not to forget Sacred words filled with regret Hate yourself another time Close your eyes and you’ll be fine How can my head Wrap itself around what you did Found no reason Still I hope to see you again

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released May 27, 2022

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Violet Evergreen Baltimore, Maryland

Baltimore, MD

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